My goal the past week or more has been to focus on correcting some of my I’m-NOT-doing-it-right behaviors (and in doing the corrections, I’m adding to my list of things I’m doing right, which helps). For example, I’m wallowing in self-pity for a number of reasons (sorry for the vagueness). Therefore, I should be carrying around my positivity notebook everywhere I go–and not just carrying it, but opening it and writing in it. But…baby steps! One little thing I did right was this: I pulled it out on Friday and read the thing cover to cover. Granted, 75% of it is still blank, but I’ll get there. I keep reminding myself that the more I write in it, the more valuable a resource it becomes.
Also in the self-care department, I took a bubble bath 3 days in a row. Hmm, after writing that here, I’m noticing something: I am a lucky woman to be able to sneak off for 30-45 minutes 3 days in a row, don’t you think? It wasn’t all peaches, though, believe me. It is rare to have a completely uninterrupted bath, despite the fact that we do have more than one bathroom in my house. But the act of slipping into the water and opening up a book was a glorious step in the right direction, and it made me happy to do it, even if the feeling didn’t last as long as I’d have liked.
My husband has seen how the past few weeks of this dismal winter–and the waiting and the stress and so on–has affected me and kindly offered to treat me to a massage at my favorite spa. I accepted, gratefully, even though I sort of didn’t want to go. Jax was sick since Thursday night (ruptured eardrum), meaning I’d barely slept for several nights in a row but had still gone to work, where things are very busy. Moments before I had to leave to go to the massage, I had one of the worst parenting moments I’ve had to date, when I had to–gasp–discipline Jax (by taking a toy away). Immediately after this happened, I had to leave in order to make the massage appointment, with Jax sobbing in my kitchen. I never like to walk away from Jax when he is upset, so it was incredibly difficult for me to let my husband handle it (his request) and walk away the bad guy. I sat in my car, parked out front of my house, and texted my husband that I was going to cancel and just drive around and clear my head. Fortunately, he talked me out of doing that and reminded me that discipline is part of parenthood! I went to the massage, and I let the massage therapist work out the tension in my neck and shoulders. She commented, “Even your feet are tense!”
It’s February, too, which means more gray, rainy, cold days than any human should have to endure. Not enough snow to play in, to at least make the other yucky days more bearable! Yes, I know it’s a short month, Valentine’s Day, blah blah blah…. My self-care goal for the rest of this week is to
find make time for my SAD lamp. It’s apparent I need it! I’ve been too busy to use it, and I’m trying not to mess up my sleep even further by using it after dinner (which is when my only free time happens, if I get any). So it’s a bit of a conundrum. If you use one, when do you make time for it?
So, even though I feel as if I’m failing in some areas of my life these days, I’m mostly rocking the self-care. I just hope to start feeling the effects more noticeably soon, because I can barely stand my miserable self.
In a perfect world, I’ll be making some time to write a few better blog posts, too. ;)
I have a surprise for one of you who links up to this bloghop! I’m going to give away one of my must-haves for the ultimate bubble bath–a Lush bubble bar. This one, in fact. It smells like coconut meets chocolate meets a smidge of orange. Instant mood-changer. All you have to do is write your I’m Doing It Right post and link to it here. Your link is your entry. Next Monday, I’ll select one winner at random.