I’m such a hypocrite. My ears perk as soon as someone in a mile radius uses the word “never” or “always.” I tell others to avoid using those words because they aren’t true most of the time. In my book, they are bad words. I will think you’re fibbing if you tell me you always or never do something.
However, I find myself always using those bad words.
Ha–see what I did there? I’m sure you don’t really believe that I always use bad words. Who can always use bad words? Who can always do anything? Not me. I’m inconsistent, if nothing else.
When Jax has a bad night of sleep–and therefore I have a bad night of sleep–I use the word “never” over & over again, like this: “I’m never going to sleep again!” or “He’ll never sleep through the night!”
How do you think that affects my perspective? What perspective, more like it! It is hard to be optimistic, hopeful, and positive when you have negative words like “never” in your vocabulary.
I’m sure you can relate to it this way: It isn’t hard for me to think of a list of things I thought I’d never do as a parent (before I actually was a parent). Like breastfeed past a year or co-sleep, for starters.
See? I shouldn’t have used “never” but opted for the much gentler “probably” or something! I made a hypocrite of myself again! Further, I set myself up to feel bad about either my choices as a parent or how clueless I was years ago.
In closing, I’ve added this important little rule to my Anxiety Tips page as a reminder to reduce my use of those words:
Do not use the words “always” and “never.” They aren’t true.
Using bad words–or ANY negative self-talk–can lead to a bad state of mind; it isn’t nice to lie to yourself, ya know?
What bad words do you find yourself repeating over & over again, to your dismay?